God dammit, people. You know the saying “If you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all”? Well you can say not-nice things to me all you want, but “If you have NOTHING to say, don’t say anything at all [to me]“.
Stop asking me “What’s Up?”
What? is UP? I have a blog, 2 Myspace profiles, a Facebook and a god damn Twitter that I update bi-daily with nothing but “what. is UP”. What makes you so god damn better than everyone else that you deserve your own private briefing while everyone else has to
“How are you?”
Can you not read the word next to “mood” you sonofabitch? Did I choose that particular emoticon out of a display of dozens to appear next to it for nothing? Why do you spit on my hard work? Why do you insult me by ignoring my attempts to broadcast personal information to you?
From now on, these are the only answers I will entertain your stupid nonsense questions with:
Question: How are you?
Answer: medium-rare
Question: Whats Up?
Answer: A new Disney/Pixar animated movie featuring the voice talent of Ed Asner.
