Richardland Blog

Amiracle11: hey!!
Amiracle11: what u doing?
aesomestguyever some work on my website
Amiracle11: oh okay cool. how far are you from me i forget
aesomestguyever from weho? like 40min
Amiracle11: well i have the place to myself tonight and tomorrow, have a beautiful roof top and a fridge full of beer if you are intersted
Amiracle11: since youre the awesomestguyever and all
aesomestguyever roomies out of town?
Amiracle11: yup
Amiracle11: i live in a loft. it is so nice out at night.. and theres a roof.. and i have so much beer lol be nice to go up there and have a few and hang out in sleeping bags lol
Amiracle11: its on santa monica
Amiracle11: west hollywood
Amiracle11: you have a beautiful face just to let u know but im sure u do
aesomestguyever ya thanks for noticing. its pretty rockin.
Amiracle11: no problem. so what do u think?
aesomestguyever im kinda busy
Amiracle11: alright well it will def be fun.
Amiracle11: do u like beer?
aesomestguyever im afraid not. cant help you with the surplus
Amiracle11: lol thats okay doesnt matter i just have so much of it. do you like card games?
aesomestguyever notsomuch
Amiracle11: okayyy well what about cuddling in a sleeping bag on the roof at night?
Amiracle11: youre a tough cookie
aesomestguyever your moms a tough cookie
Amiracle11: i have wii bowling? how do i amuse u!
Amiracle11: movies?
Amiracle11: massage…?
Amiracle11: lol
aesomestguyever i like my massages the way i like my movies
aesomestguyever with a happy ending
Amiracle11: funnyyyyyyy
Amiracle11: well how bout this, a massage, and a movie with an actual happy ending
Amiracle11: we can get like, cinderella
aesomestguyever sounds…wonderful
Amiracle11: are you being… sarcastic
aesomestguyever no. THAT gay and lame…
Amiracle11: lol its okay i was just joking. obviously.. im craving scary movies
Amiracle11: cuz if i like you its an excuse to cuddle you but you didnt hear that from me… lol
aesomestguyever uh. ya i did. you just said it. just now. i heard it [visually]. from you…

andrewneedshelp: know any good free ringtone sites?
Richar900: none. sorry
andrewneedshelp: gay
Richar900: i make them on my mac
andrewneedshelp: dood
andrewneedshelp: turn the gay dial a smidge
andrewneedshelp: “i make them on my mac”
andrewneedshelp: do you have a tshirt that says, “please stick it in my ass” too?
andrewneedshelp:
Richar900: in large AND medium (they shrink in the wash)
andrewneedshelp: AHAHAHAHA
Richar900: point taken on the way it sounds, but it really just consists of pressing “open file” > choose song > save as ringtone.
Richar900: and then having gay sex
andrewneedshelp: in what software?
Richar900: Garageband. Mac onliez sukka
andrewneedshelp: ah
andrewneedshelp: iphone 2.1 didnt do shit for dropped calls
andrewneedshelp: fuck steve jobs
Richar900: i want one just for the headphone jack. what asshole puts a 5 inch long jack in a phone? i have to tie a rubberband around the plug and the phone to make it push that extra milicentimeter to connect when i wanna use my Bose headphones
andrewneedshelp: hahahaha
Richar900: people in airports n stuff are like “whats that?” and i say “my adaptor” and act like im cool as i smugly put my noise cancelling earmuffs on but everyone really knows im just a douche. its cool though cuz i cant hear them at that point

I answered a stranger named “big al” on myspace whether I actually hit the girl in the Is Violence Against Women Funny? video and recieved this curious response (you have to read bottom to top):

I responded asking why I would want to show my ass in Tennessee (or any other state for that matter). I clicked over to see who exactly this person afraid of seeing my ass was and saw just how cool he actually is…

Clearly this young man is a force to be reckoned with. Not only does he look good at his cousins wedding (lol), play in the rain (lol) and have a friend who is “the shit” (that too is funniez! ha ha!), but he finally got insurance (yay! if i don’t show you my ass can i havs a ride????) and he is a Pimp - as evidenced by the Microsoft Paint addition to that awesome picture of him doing his impression of Uncle Sam in a really bright bowling alley, dated 2 years ago. We know he is the one who is the pimp and not the other people in the picture because there is an arrow clearly pointing to him, and what can i say the letters don’t lie. Indeed they are honest (though some punctuation would have made it less confusing) but that doesn’t mean they have to make any damn sense, as shown by the caption under that sexahh azz boday saying “i guess better i can bench my body weight finally”.

He’s also an accomplished athlete. This is his current main picture if you couldn’t make it out from the conversation screenshot:

Well, one thing is for sure: This is one boy class 5 that will always have a first place in my heart.

I leave you only with this picture of big al. I think the caption says it all…

BigDogDaddy83 (8:27:17 PM): sorry i never got back to you yesterday. my gf blindsided me by giving me a puppy.

richar900 (8:32:36 PM): wtf u gun do wit a gad dang puppeh son?

richar900 (8:32:59 PM): that ain nuthin but “practice for when i stop taking my birth control”

richar900 (8:33:04 PM): run. fast.

BigDogDaddy83 (8:33:31 PM): whoa

BigDogDaddy83 (8:33:32 PM): word……

BigDogDaddy83 (8:33:37 PM): ::runs::

richar900 (8:39:22 PM): cha. and you cant drop a kid off at a shelter and make someone else pay for all its shots, kibble and rubber chew toys and whatever the hell else kids need either

Awhile ago I got tired of the 350 group and event invitations piling up on my facebook account so I accepted every one of them. That was before I knew that when you join a group or event, the originator of each can mass message its members. So now I’m constantly annoyed by club promos and party event nightlife spam, but every once in awhile I get an interesting one. Like. today. Asking me to remember the terrorist attacks of September 11th 2001. by drinking vodka at a fashion club.

clicks it ifs you cants reads it

Well… you can’t. really. say they made it too tacky. right? I guess?
I should go. I’m sure the “special guest DJ” (FINALLY. i’m sick of their regular guy) will be bringing the house down with “God Bless America” and Enya remixes containing news reports all night.

Ladies and gentleman alike, no doubt, will be rockin out in red white and blue clubbing clothes as the conversation at the bar and on the dance floor is centered around the horrors of Islamo-terrorism and the changes it brought upon the world.

The metal adorned navel in the promo image is probably symbolism for the center of our country that was attacked - pierced, if you will - by hateful extremists on that day.

Perhaps the double bars on the bellybutton ring are to represent the twin towers as they’re silver, but with just a splash of red in an otherwise grayscale upper half of the poster.

Gray, like the Word Trade Center. Red like the blood of the 3 thousand people murdered there.

The image’s featuring of exposed and sexified female (we assume) midriff and promoting Skyy vodka at the event must be their way of sticking it to the Islamist ideology that hates us for our decitant ways.

And that is why we must drink Skyy vodka and party it up on 9/11. at the Whip Lounge.

Because if we don’t… the terrorists win.

Update: Brian sent out an apology for this the next day.

djpsyan (11:42:25 PM): hi.

Richar900 (11:42:38 PM): yes

djpsyan (11:42:56 PM): ? is that how you great?

Richar900 (11:43:28 PM): correct. especially strangers. identify yourself to proceed please.

djpsyan (11:44:11 PM): hahehaheaeh I thought you were a pretty cool guy when we talked before but now I just see you are a fucking jerk, go fuck yourself princes

djpsyan signed off at 11:44:19 PM.

andrewneedshelp : i’m naked
Richar900 : interesting. you mean to convey that you have recently let down your guard and settled the apprehensions that normally limit your every day activity, thus leaving you with a sense of freedom and openness, but also disarmed - disrobed if you will - and you want others such as myself to know?
andrewneedshelp : yes
andrewneedshelp : that is exactly what i mean to convey.

It’s also known as Bryers Cookies & Creme. Cuz if you melt it just enough, its indistinguishable from the tasty McDonalds icecream-in-a-cup-kinda-thing they call a flurry. With a Mc of course. everythings gotta have a Mc on it.

My freezer is dialed to a lower cold level than it should be and has been for awhile, but the dial is at the back wall of the damn thing and I gotz foods in theres so wtf. I can’t get to that thing. It’s cool though (*nomination for best pun of the week) cuz everything from burgers to steaks to my ex girlfriends ring finger still stay perfectly frozen at this current setting. Ice cream is the only culprit that doesn’t freeze, but it doesnt actually “melt” so its never made me make the effort to turn up the chill.

The temp has turned my cookies & creme into McFlurry, which is blogworthy cuz you would think the “cookies” would be different or the “creme” would be different in SOME way that would make it similar but not quiiiiiite the same as a triple-F (fast food flurry. i just made it up and now its gonna catch on cuz im a trendsetter, so loogout bitchez). But no…no.

Its the same as people. Or, no. It’s the same -comma- people. That’s what I meant. Except not really cuz using “people” as a direct addressive was federally banned after Michelle in Full House turned 5.

Its probably the most fortuitous byproduct of an act of laziness thats happened to me since that other time with that other thing.

I dont like the word “blogosphere”. I forget why. Oh ya. cuz its lame and unnecessary. It turns a single sylable perfectly encompassing descriptive word into a 3 sylable attempt to paint a bigger, broader image of lameness.

Reading something on the “blogs” is no different than reading something on the “blogosphere”. You just sound more lame if you use the latter.

quit it.