Big pimpin. the Bushnell way…

Even though it will be turned back on tomorrow – I couldn’t handle the lack of internetz here at my brothers house in Florida so I drove Aidan up to the town square where they have free Wifi, I guess to lure patrons to the local shops. Their marketing strategy worked, cuz Aidan went to Starbucks and as we sipped on the stadium seating with our lappytoppies, I snapped this pic and uploaded it to his Facebook with the following caption:

I thought it was about time i took a photo of you where you WERENT sleeping for once. thanks for the mocha latte carmelotto grande with whipped cream, Bestie!!!1
#chillaxin @ the park

Now it’s time to go eat the same amount of food I would at any other meal at any other time of the year but pretend like it’s a big deal cuz evidently everyone else is going balls out with their portions or something.

But before I go: quit being such a Hipster dick, Canada…

Oy… I’m never thrilled about new ink on young bodies but it looks good and he’s a good lad, so uncle Rich doesn’t have any nay-saying this time. And even though he decided not to go with my idea of only getting half the crest done so i could get the other half and we could become a Bushnell Super Hero when we push our boobs together, I still hope he has an awesome birthday and can’t wait to see him in a couple weeks for Thanksgiving.

Here are some lil-Aidan Richardland memories as well as some recent ones:

^I still don’t remember why we had his birthday so early in the day but I DO remember dying my hair black and doing the coffee-house facial hair thing that year cuz it was hilarious.

and now a new era with new brothers:

He’s matured so much…

*lightly brushes his face with a reverse palm*..
goodnight sweet prince…
*que unsettling end credits music from Dexter as i slowly walk backwards exiting the room*

My tongue is blue from an Icee and the scream of terror is of course real.
Aidan (nephew), who just turned 16 but looks 25 already, is showing off.
Rowan (nephew) is displaying a similar look of terror that is also genuine. He loved the ride though.
and then it gets weird…
the couple on the bottom right are unknowns/not with us.
The couple on the left is my sister in-law Sarah and brother Casey and yes she is biting him… It was mentioned at the end of the slide but the proof is captured on video that this weirdos evolutionary panic response is to clutch and bite her mate… Make your own conclusions.

Not seen here: baby Brody was just half an inch too little to ride so his parents stayed out with him. too bad, he woulda loved it. Nephew Riley, 6, went on it the first time but didnt want to go again. He closed his eyes for most of the rides – even the 3D Spiderman cartoon ride, but finally opened up to bravery at the very last ride of the day – Harry Potter, which was the fastest, scariest one we went on but he liked it.

More gems from my week with the younger nephews:

“you stink butt toilet poop! im gonna fart in yor unda-wear!” & “you’re a butt and you stink like butt, BUTT Stink!”
- Rowan Bushnell, 4

“untle Richard. um. um. uh whats..uh whats ‘gay’? – [fake answer] – “haha. im gay! im gay im gay! haha. im so gayyyy!” – [real answer] – “um.. i dont think thats rilly it cuz if 2 boys kissed eachother they’d prolly go tu jail”.
- Riley Bushnell, 6

“Instead a Easter they should call it Ster-Eee cuz you STIR the chocolate and then you EAT it, so Ster-ea, not Ea-ster…”
- Riley Bushnell, 6

“Touch that again and it’s gonna rain spank-bombs like a Giant’s tears after he found out he wasn’t invited to a birthday party”
- uncle Rich, layin down tha law.

From there we headed to McDonalds where I was able to point out to him the importance of doing well in school, as the lady who served us had to make her 3 kids wait at a table until she got off work… from her job at McDonalds. 3 kids. just saying.

Next stop: strip mall down the road where we’ll have my dad pick us up. In the mean time? Dalla Stooooore yo.