Richardland Blog » hawaii

Traveling for the lulz

richard — Thu, 04 Nov 2010 08:50:43 +0000

Most of my traveling this year has been for funny Facebook statuses and such.

It rained for 4 days straight here at home so I posted a status announcing that I did not move to California for this crap and would be spending the rest of the week in Hawaii. so while in Hawaii, when a cloudy day came, I had to remain consistent and leave. so I did.

Jungle Bath

richard — Thu, 29 Apr 2010 20:30:59 +0000

Sexy room service

richard — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 09:43:35 +0000

Papaya appetizer with a steak and lobster dinner in my apartment.

If there was any conceivable way I could have sex with this meal, I would put a fkkn baby in that shit.

Steak was rare, lobster was juicy, papaya was both.

Infinity done right

richard — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 09:43:31 +0000

The Sheraton hotel in Waikiki finally stepped up to the plate and redid their pool to join the 21st century of how pools are supposed to be. They rebranded the bar area next to it (its now called “the edge”) and turned their little swimhole on the beach into a kickass infinity pool.

Awesome vs Scary @ the beach

richard — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 10:18:04 +0000

I walked down the beach today to a point where I thought the beach ended all these years I’ve been coming to Hawaii, but only today realized there is a thin cement walkway allowing further travel. i took it and ended up walking pretty far around Diamond Head crater.

Getting a smile & a flirty look from a 20ish yr old topless girl on the beach?
awesome.

Getting the same from the guy shes with?
terrifying

Rock hiding swim stuffs

richard — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 23:28:01 +0000

IDEA! – i hate not being able to swim when i bring my iphone down to the beach (cuz itll get stolen) but i know how/where to hide it now. I’ll walk out on that rock wall in the circle of the railing in this picture (cropped to emphasis what i’m referring to) and wrap it in my towel and swim off there it’ll take someone like 5 minutes to get all the way out there, which i would see from the water and notice if they were went rummaging. BAM

Halloween in Hawaii 2009: the Bill O’Reilly “costume”

richard — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 20:43:59 +0000

Just when you thought you had seen every version of the “sexy/slutty person, thing or concept”, there comes this: Slutty Bill O’Reilly.

For those not familiar with the highest rated show in cable news: Bill O’Reilly’s O’Reilly Factor on the Fox News Channel is what Stephen Colbert’s show and persona is a parody of. The tagline of the show is “The Spin Stops Here” referring to the Nixon coined term “Spin” (think Michael J Fox’s “Spin City” if you are able to remember that that was a show), meaning the act of a politician taking a truth or partial truth and essentially lying with it, but with enough truth involved in the lie that they have deniability.

O’Reilly’s site sells “Factor Gear” whose proceeds go to charity and one of the items is a BillO’Reilly.com beach towel…

other awesome gear that I own include a doormat, shirt and – i shit you not – an umbrella that says “the rain stops here”… cuz thats how i roll…

The O’Sexy Factor? Slutty Bill O’Reilly? No Spin Cabana boy Factor Faggot? Call it what you want, but I was breakin so many necks, I should have called it “Christopher Reeve’s horse”. what, too soon?

I’d like to say I went out in ONLY this, but i chickened out and wore some orange & black boxer under it where a little duct tape held some cash and my ID sandwiched between my my credit card and Costco membership (cuz 1, you never know, and 2, i found that hilarious) with my apartment key double taping the outside.

Today’s swim: Pier 2 Pink

richard — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 22:27:44 +0000

Building up to a 2 mile swim (the length of Waikiki beach). Today: Pier to Pink. I’m about to go downstairs out to the pier in front of the apt, jump off and swim left toward Diamond Head and turn in after the retainer wall @ the Pink Hotel and walk back. will see how tired that makes me…

So like… I guess I’ll just go to Hawaii or something

richard — Sun, 25 Oct 2009 22:47:14 +0000

As previously detailed, I was stuck in Texas for a whole extra month than I had planned. Now that I could finally get back home to California, my enthusiasm dwindled when I remembered that the pool of people I don’t hate there, while having always been shallow, was drying up more each week (for instance: a recent female “friend” posted an album of “party pictures” on her Facebook containing mostly nude shots of her getting trashed, doing lines of coke and other random classy behavior). I have to get back to do some business, but it can wait. I was also miffed that I didn’t have plans for Halloween, my once favorite holiday, and my Myspace and Facebook had only invites to raves, events like Monster Massive and mansion parties where I would be bored to tears.

Then I remembered I had family owned tropical beach front real estate.

So I decided, eff it. I’ll just go to Hawaii for the week.

So I did. and now I’m here.

And when I was entering the baggage claim, the airport employee in front of me had glow in the dark spiders in her hair. that was kinda cool.

Yeay for Hawaiiloween…

Sean Hannity is flabbergasted @ my new TV

richard — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 21:51:54 +0000

Loudmouth cable news host Sean Hannity (shown here), was left speechless today as he found himself appearing on none other than a 32 inch flat panel television set in the Bushnell family’s Waikiki apartment. “I can’t believe this sh#t” exclaimed the Fox News commentator as news was also delivered to him that the monitor displaying his image was reportedly purchased for a scant $430. “You really are a great American” Hannity declared (though who exactly he was directing that lame stock phrase to in this context was unclear).

Former Speaker of the House and current Fox News commentator, Newt Gingrich couldn’t believe his f#cking eyes either. “I normally have a bit of a squinty facial posture as it is” said the Speaker, “but when I’m in the presence of sh#t like this, I..[chuckle]..I just can’t look directly at it, its so awesome, really”. The former congressman added that “It’s no wonder that Hannity shut his fat god damn mouth for more than 8 seconds while in awe of this kickass amenity” and when it was pointed out that Hannity’s mouth was actually wide open during his exasperated reaction to the tv, Mr Gingrich shot back: “Christ man, it was a figure of speech to convey that he paused talking. don’t change the subject from this sweet addition to what was already a schway pad yo. god damn”.

When asked to comment on the televisions ability to rotate a full 100 degrees from living room to bedroom and stay out of the way of the privacy divider that runs behind the table, the congressman was quoted as saying “It’s truly unf#cking believable. Now that it’s in place, I’m surprised it has taken this long to happen. This was the kind of Hope & Change President Obama promised us and it warms my stone cold evil-conservative heart to see one family doing their part to make their ocean front real estate the best it can be”.