Don’t Smoke. But weed is a better choice than cigarettes

How is it even possible that any generation born after the 70s ever picked up smoking cigarettes?

The only exceptions I can understand are poor to lower middle class people with high stress work and family lives. In those cases, they feel like they need a stress reliever but cant always just down a Jack Daniels with lunch or have some shots on break at work. So fine – whatever. You’re an adult, you’ve got shit goin on, it takes a lot out of you – it’s not a good choice but at least I get it…
But teenagers? Anyone under 25 even? wtf? You people are idiots.

Whats your excuse? Mom is on your back? Learning about new things in school is too much of a drag? Your lack of job, car or any real responsibility is so much pressure on you that you just need to relax with a few smokes to take the weight of the world off? Stfu you pathetic twits.

Young smokers are the most transparent “rebels” that exist. You think you’re heros and martyrs for doing something that enslaves you and makes you weak and then want extra credit for how much you don’t care about people accurately noting that you’re falling right into a childish trap and scam.

Cigarettes do nothing but addict you, fuck up your skin, teeth and hair, reduce your lung capacity and skyrocket your likelihood of getting cancer and other diseases since it kicks your immune system in the balls.

If you absolutely MUST light something on fire and suck the smoke from it into your lungs – there is an all natural alternative with no added tar, chemicals or synthetics that makes you feel good in exchange for killing the same amount of brain function (or less) you would via drinking alcohol except theres no hangover and its non-addicting. It’s called Marijuana and you need it just as not-at-all as you do cigarettes, and depending on where you live and how old you are, it may be as illegal as your cigarette smoking hobby. THC will have a better effect on your body than nicotine (+ a million other chemicals) and is just the smarter alternative, despite its legal status. It’s not healthy, and you’re still a loser who fails at life if you seek it out for answers to your teen problems or rely on it for fun or an escape from reality, but at least you’re getting a more justifiable effect for your trouble than you would from cigarettes.

The smartest alternative to both cigs and weed of course is to abstain from that shit all together. Have you ever met a Mormon? They’re peppy, upbeat ambitious fucks. and they don’t even drink caffeine. The existence of Mormons proves you don’t need to alter your consciousness to be happy, deal with stress, fight boredom or get through your drag of a life.

But back to the main point: Since you’re probably too weak, both physically and mentally, to not rely on the security blanket that is a substance that makes you feel something through chemical effects that society says is bad for you (ooo, you’re such a rebel!) – when it comes to smoking things and you don’t have kids and aren’t already addicted to nicotine already but you desperately feel the need to fill a hole in your life with some kind of counter culture indulgence: weed is your smarter option.

Young people smoking cigarettes might as well just tattoo “i am easily manipulated and not very smart” on themselves. There’s no excuse anymore. The science is settled. The verdict is in. Making a counter-culture statement by smoking is no better and less pathetic than doing it by cutting your arms. Wtf people. it’s 2011. not 1942.

Marijuana at least has a recreational and non-physically harmful use, but if we’re to look at it’s most lame users: it’s for douche pseudo-sages who aren’t smart enough to be enthusiastic or interested in any of the hundreds of options available to them.

Cigarettes on the other hand have the much smaller acceptable usage window described earlier (stressed out, high productivity people) and mostly are for chump ass kids trying to copy what they see in media so they can feel like they’re in control of their adulthood when really it couldn’t be more of a transparent cliche sign of not being very interesting.


“am I cool yet?? I mean.. I dont care.. it’s whatever, mayn.. but like… I look cool, right?…right?”

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