If you’re tired in the morning – have you tried just, like, not doing that? 

You coffee addicts really gotta try harder.

We all wake up tired sometimes but if you need coffee EVERY dang morning then don’t you realize there’s something wrong with you that you need to fix? Like, you’re over here goin “yea – coffee is the fix”, but that’s just treating the symptom and not the disease. The disease is yo sleepy ass doing-bed all night long and still consistently waking up so ding dang dong unalert and groggy that you need to boil burnt beans and drink their drug water. Bro… you’ve got a problem.

I know it’s easy for me to judge, being a non-coffee drinker who’s never had a full cup in his life, but also – don’t you ever wonder what that is like? To live a life where you do more before and during sleep to work towards a goal of waking up in the morning feeling like you just woke up instead of feeling like you’re ready to go to sleep for the day?

Here’s my suggestion: When you’re all foggy and lame in the morning and you feel like you need a coffee to become human again – try, just, like, not doing that.

Drink water instead. First thing. I keep bottles next to my bed. The micro plastics are killing me but the wake-up hydration is keeping me off the coffee so maybe it’s worth it. But that’s the move: Glug glug glug — ahh, refreshing. Wakes the system up.

Then, after that: Try – and you really have to try at this, cuz for some it might be harder than others – to just not be such a little bitch. If you try hard enough, then you can overcome the grog and before too long you’ll get goin.

The biggest thing this requires is a mentality of *wanting* to be awake. Not forcing it because you have to function but a desire to perform reasonably well for the day. You don’t have to like your job or your marriage or your annoying kids or your neighbors or your coworkers or yourself – you just have to want to slay the day enough to focus on it.

-Yea, I can feel this isn’t working. But you should still think about it and consider it.

If I can do it, you can too.

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