Swarthy creatures that they are, human beings have a playbook of techniques they pull out when verbally dueling someone and sometimes you have to identify it to react accordingly when its used. Like how mine is saint-like honesty and bold but respectful frankness, delivered with the poise and grace of what truly is a literary marvel – a grammatical god among men, if you will – that blasts light upon the truth that is my side, while crushing hopelessly the vile fallacious fallacies of my aggressor…
Well, once you know the technique, you can take advantage of it.
Mah gurl LoCump (Lauren Compass), mainly uses the appeal to authority, delivered with a heavy dose of sarcasm, the nutmeg of language (cuz a little is tasty, too much will make you puke, and an injection of it will kill you). She uses this awesome trick of accusing you of something and then accusing you of weaseling out of it if you say literally anything in response. So it would be like:
Lauren: you’re addicted to prescription pain pills
You: what? no I’m not
Lauren: oooh, now you’re gonna try to go back on it
You: go back on what? I’ve never even had a—
Lauren: < oooh, oookay /sarcasm>
It’s quite clever cuz it rejects your premise before you’ve even stated it – an effort achieved by preemptively dismissing your response on the basis that her original claim is such an obvious empirical fact that if you’re going to try to challenge it, then clearly whatever you’re about to say is going to be retarded.
