Today is dedicated to trying to figure out what is a proper condensed way of quickly saying “I’m wearing Shape-ups, so i’m actually going faster than you” to a fellow runner whom you suspect may be know is silently judging you as they sprint past you going up a hill…
Cuz I’m not about to just continue staying silent as I get sprinted past by inferior specimens without them understanding that the footwear I have shackled myself with has a padded arc that is making each one of my steps more of an exertion and thus, I am better than them. But how do I signal that to them quickly without stopping them for a 5 minute lecture, is the question…
A friend suggests “flipping them the bird”, but that only conveys the emotion. not the information. I wanna do something more like pass out fliers that explains the energy expenditure between us with citations of data from my Nike widget in my shoe that talks to its corresponding iPhone app to measure speed and distance and then maybe bring in a physicist, Annie Hall style, to explain why i’m a superior athlete – with diagrams, if possible.
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