Have a beard to show you’re not gay

Dear bitchez:

does the beard happen? or does it not happen? what are we gonna do about this?…

I’m kidding of course, cuz I don’t give a crap what any of you think since I’m secure in the knowledge that you’ll all wanna do me no matter how I mangle my face, refuse to wash myself or talk only in a Bullwinkle voice, but posing the question did clue me into a new gay slang I wasn’t in on before. Facebook friend message tells me:

Richard, since I’m sure you already have a “beard” girlfriend, having an actual beard too may be too much. But what do I know, I’m not one of the bitchez

I had to urban-dictionary wtf that meant and found out that a beard is: “Any opposite sex escort taken to an event in an effort to give a homosexual person the appearance of being out on a date with a person of the opposite sex.”

I will take this issue of potential redundancy under consideration.

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