I should rent a car? you should eat my balls

I’m in Missouri for a week before heading to Texas for the Holid goddamnChristmas and seeing old friends from when I used to live here just a scant 5ish years ago and new ones that I’ve made on subsequent visits. It’s all gone great except that I’ve noticed that the new ones, which are all younger, are much more willing eager to drive long distances to seek an audience of my awesomeness than the my-age burnt out yuppies.

I am here in their miserable state within a highly reasonable distance to travel to me, and they’re concerned about work schedules and meeting halfway bullshit? Um. how bout you get off your lazy ass and come see me so I can reservee my car borrowing for when I actually need it while I’m here. kay?

Several of these douches even suggested that I rent a car while I’m here. Rent. a goddamn CAR? are you friggin kidding me? renting a car is for when you visit family you’re not terribly close with and can’t impose upon or business trips where you don’t know anyone.

Who the hell do you think you are you country ass fruitloop weinerheads? I’m flying into your back yard and you cant open the screen door and walk down the friggin steps to come say howdy? I should rent a car to come see YOU?

how bout this…(Me in purple, you in blue).

I travel this distance to see you:

You travel this distance to see me:

Deal?
No deal. cuz I changed my mind bitches. Rent a car and come beg for my forgiveness and we’ll see. how much I laugh at you. cuz you suck.

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