I’ll Pee the Bed if I Feel Like It

Just downed 2 full bottles of water. at first i was like “aw, bad idea before bed” but then i was like pssh. im a grown ass man. i’ll piss tha bed if i WANT, bitch

been up for 2 hours and still no urge to urinate. amazing and interesting stuff right here, i know. the workout and hot bath before bed must have drained me at least 2 bottles worth. weird. and yes – you’ll be happy to know that i played this game of Piss Roulette by myself. I’m so thoughtful that I even decided that if i WHERE to be awoken with that annoying bladder pressure and did exercise my right to let it fly free that i would, compassionate empathetic glowing ball of grace that i am, wash the sheets myself instead of making some nearby female do it (since ive only done laundry like 4 times ever). A saint walks among you, my children. be thankful.

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