If you open up todays Catholic Times Post Gazette, you’ll find out the shocking and little known news that Pop John Paul the 2nd has died. What you didn’t read in any of the columns was that he warned me about it.
Check it mates: true story… 2 days before the Pope died, I had a dream where I was laying on the floor in the bedroom i was sleeping in and John Paul ll leaned over to look down on me from the bed i was next to – looked at me for a moment and then made a face where his eyes got bigger and mouth slightly opened and then slowly eased back into the bed out of sight from me.
I woke up checking the newswires to see if he had died and he hadn’t. but Terri Schiavo did and the 2nd big story was that the Pope had taken a considerable turn for the worse.
He died shortly after.
Coincidence? uh. duh. I think we all know that its far more likely that my dream was a super natural attempt to contact me by a dying Catholic clergyman so I could tell my millions dozens of viewers the tale and restore their faith in God. the Catholic God. the one that cares if you masturbate.
So…. call me a prophet, but I’m really just doing my duty to the almighty.
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