Resist the Change. Return to Retro

In anti-Obama change-resistant mode, my body began craving oldschool video games after the election on the 5th. Mostly Nintendo games that I missed out on growing up or SNES games that were unavailable to me because I picked the wrong system in the 16-bit wars.

donkey kong. Pictures, Images and Photos

My first choice was the Megaman series for NES, but an NES was unavailable to me since apparently my aunt got rid of hers years ago. Choice 2 was Donkey Kong Country for SNES. also unavailable to me, so I asked Santa for the system and the 3 games in the series, to which Santa/my mom was extremely surprised. Until then I have all 3 on Gameboy. not Gameboy DS. not Gameboy Advance. not even Gameboy Color… just… regular shitty Gameboy Pocket.

I pried out the crusty oxidized double A batteries from it, chose DK2 and picked up a saved game that hadn’t been played since 1998 when my family moved from NY to Missouri and I played the games to pass the time. I played Kirbys Dreamland and Wario 2 more though, so this DK2 game wasn’t very far along. Still, it was fun, but the graphics were terrible. Seriously Gameboy? No color or backlit screen even? Wtf? I also had a GameGear, which I loved dearly despite it containing hardly any enjoyable games. Here Gameboy was with the better games and no way to enjoy them without extreme hunching and squinting.

Whatever. Donkey Kong Country RULES. Man did I really miss out having a shitty Sega Genesis instead of an awesome SNES. This has been bothering me for over a decade, but even more now that I experience what exactly I was missing.

Dear Sega:

Die. Oh wait. you did. cuz you suck. Eff you.

-Richard

PS Afterthought: I was about to save this post when I saw Obama’s name there at the top in a dangerously close proximity to an image of an ape and thought “oh no’s! that means I’m racist now!”. Dammit. screw it. I’m not changing a thing. the dude’s president. racism is dead. send your hatemail to the 2nd ventricle of my colon (where the jokes on you, suckers, cuz colons dont have ventricles! lolz!!!1)

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